The 2010 Jet Set Awards

4 01 2011

The winners include;

Highlight of the Year

1. 2010 Welsh Cup Final – We were winning 2-0 easily in the first half. Then we were drawing 2-2 by the last 5 minutes. Then we grimly hung on with white fingertips. Then we prayed for extra time. Then Sion crossed the ball and Dave Morley rose to meet it with his head. The ball went in and the Jet Set cleared 2 rows of seats in celebration. We even managed to help organise the coach travel for the blue army!

2. Bangor City 2 Honka Espoo 1 –  Before the match there was a certain feeling doing the rounds, that little thing called hope! Bangor City finally stood a good chance of progressing in European competition, defeat simply wasn’t on the agenda! Then the game started and Honka scored. Suddenly it wasn’t so easy and to make things worse Honka looked dangerous as they applied pressure to our defence. By the second half things were getting desperate but then we scored. Hope was back  but quickly replaced by tension; although the fates seemed with us a goal wasn’t coming. Then there was a cross followed by confusion. In the melee we managed to see Chris Jones hit the ball for our winner. Bangor were through and the Jet Set stood there shaking and elated, unable to comprehend what we’d just seen.

Lowlight of the Year

Sharing a pitch with Llandudno’s 6-a-side league players

Over the years we’ve grown tired of the players, the fans, the hype and even some football but we thought that was as far as our ennui with the game could go. Unfortunately our ennui has increased, now we’ve grown tired playing football. Thank you Llandudno’s players!

When they’re not trying to maim you, they’re too loud or they trying to use you as a canvas for their football art. The worst ones are the players that combine these characteristics with a lack of skill.

The following example represents the main reason why we’ve become disenchanted with playing; The Jet Set’s Right Wing Back moved towards the attacking gobshite in possession of the ball. The gobshite decided to show his skill by knocking it past our cultured player and proclaiming “SKINNED!!” to the world. Unfortunately for the gobshite he not only knocked it past our cultured wing back, he knocked it out of play. One suspects that our cultured wing back wasn’t the first intended victim for this skilful move.

The behaviour of gobshites like this is probably another example of how Soccer AM has ruined football

Player of the Year

1. Michael Johnston – The connoisseur’s choice. Never hurried, always in the right place, composed, passes, dribbles, blocks, tackles, clears off the line, complete player. Says hello to the Jet Set on a frequent basis.

2. Luis Suarez – Scorer of many goals at the world cup, all fabulous. Scorer many goals for Ajax too. But the main reason he gets our award is his last-minute handball in the quarter final against Ghana.

Imagine the following situation; You are standing on the line and the ball is heading for the top, your team’s chance of glory is slipping away! You instinctively palm the ball away. As you’re a striker you knew all along you’d be are sent off but you did it anyway. You also knew that a penalty would be awarded but at least there’s a chance they’ll miss the pen. As you walk off the pitch you are glad you “took one for the team” but then the fact you will miss the game hits you, you are very sad. They miss the penalty, you are so relieved that your team has a chance in the penalty shoot-out, you lose your head and celebrate like you’ve scored a winner yourself. Would you have done anything different?

The main reason Luis gets a share in our award is the incredulous reactions the incident produced, we’re looking at you Andy Townsend and your feelings of “bruised justice”. Those who should know better on the When Saturday Comes Message Board should think about what they’ve done too, especially as some on the WSC message still won’t let it lie. These people would also have recalled post-colonial history in the split second before the ball crossed the line to let the ball go in, they would not have ruined Africa.





Kev Price writes…..

5 03 2010

Our intrepid correspondent has made it back from the pub…..

Hello again!! I know it’s been a long time but you know how it is. You mean to write something but then you’re distracted, then you forget, then you can’t be bothered. I won’t bore you with the facts but let’s just say it was partly to do with those bitter Scousers in Llandudno’s pubs and leave at that.

Last Sunday was great, yet another final, yet another trip to Wembley. It feels great when you see your team at Wembley. Even though it’s the new Wembley I’m beginning to notice all the little details when I’m watching on TV, just like you did with the old one. It may only have been the Carling Cup Final but at least it keeps the silverware rolling in. What a comeback we saw, what a hero Michael Owen is (Just like I said he would be) Fergie what a genius!! Over thirty trophies won now ( you know, about thirty more than that fat Spanish waiter). Oh yeah, I’ll bet the Scousers were pig sick.

The semi-final was even better, we let the Cit-eh fans think they were going through and then, BAM!! They were out!!! To be in a pub to see the looks on their bitter faces makes you remember why you’re a football fan. Still waiting for that trophy eh lads!!! Better Luck Next time!!

And now I have to drop a bombshell…..I actually went to a game at Old Trafford!!!! That mate of mine finally came through with a ticket. When I got to the Theatre of Dreams I noticed a lot of yellow and green scarves were being worn. At first I thought this was a bit weird as we weren’t playing Norwich. Then I thought, oh it’s a tribute to our first Premier League title as we had a lovely green and yellow kit. When I asked someone what it was about, they said it was a protest against the American owners. I don’t see a problem with the owners – it’s not like they’ll do something stupid, you know like demolishing the ground or anything. Anyway we’ll be there after the owners, there will always be a United!!! Beside I don’t really care who owns my club as long as we win things and finish above the scousers,  in fact,  just finishing above the scousers will do.

Just when you think that it can’t get any better the scousers are blowing it good and proper. Last week they were on Channel 5 whilst we’re still in the Champions League and they still haven’t been to the new Wembley, life’s good! You can tell that life’s not good for those bitter people living in the past. They’re so bitter they didn’t even go to the pub like I do when Liverpool are playing, they think they’re too good for the UEFA Cup, they’re just glory hunters living in the past. You’ll see them if they get to the final though, the bitter twats

Now we can look forward to the rest of the season. If we get to 19 League Titles in May I’ll be dancing ‘til dawn. Just to repeat that idea, if we win the title it will be Title number 19 and that Rafa, is a fact!

Take Care,

Kev

(Ed: The Llandudno Jet Set still does not endorse the views written by this author)





Kev Price Continues…..

30 10 2009

More tales from the Premier League with our guest correspondent Kevin Price……

Hello again!! It’s Kevin here!! Well I was asked to write something last week and what a week to pick! That’s football for you, one day you’ve gone down to Club 147 to laugh at the Scousers getting beaten in Europe and a few days later and you’ve got them gloating over their jammy win.

You got to love those bitter fans of History FC, they haven’t won the League for nearly 2 decades (that’s right all you Scousers reading this, 20 years, 2 zero, that’s a fact Rafa!) yet you’d think they’d won the League last Sunday. Jesus they’re so bitter, they’re almost as bad as Citeh fans!!

And another thing, when you hear History FC fans being interviewed on Sky none of them actually come from the self pity City. An Everton fan I know, another Kev as it happens!!, says they all come from Norway anyway. It makes us laugh every time we meet up in Llandudno to watch the football; “How many of their fans are actually Scousers?” we ask ourselves, what a joke those Scousers are in Llandudno!! They  have a go at United for having no fans in United when they don’t come from the self pity City themselves. As for Citeh, I’m not worried, same old same old, bitter twats!!

Kowalski leant me Looking for Eric the other day but apart from Eric the King’s part I didn’t like it, there wasn’t enough United in it. I couldn’t go with him to watch FC United last Saturday because I was playing golf. He said it was good but last time I stood I only paid £6 and it gave me a bad back. I prefer sitting myself. Speaking of which a mate of mine has promised to get me a ticket before Christmas but he’s let me down in the past so I won’t hold out much hope. Besides it won’t matter if I don’t, I’ll watch it in 147. You get a good atmosphere in 147, there’s loads of regulars, it’s just like the match. Plus you can wind up all the Scousers who go there as well.

Well in terms of the League we may be second at the moment but that won’t be a problem, Europe, we’ll be through again no problems, we’re even through again in the League Cup. Compare that to History FC and it makes it even better, almost out of Europe and behind us again in the League. That’s a Fact you bitter Scousers.

See You soon,

Kev

 

(Ed: The Llandudno Jet Set does not endorse the views written by this author)





A New Face!

10 08 2009

We have decided, after months of torment and anguish, to cover the “Blessed Premiership” in all its glory. We have chosen a special correspondent to bring you up-to-date and incisive opinion. This marks a major step forward in north Walian football related reportage and we are lucky to have him. Ladies and Gentlemen I bring you …….Kevin Price!!

 

Hello everybody!!! Welcome to my new column!!!

My name is Kevin Price but you may call me Kev. As a long-time associate of the Llandudno Jet Set it gives me great pleasure to finally take my place in their golden group. It has only taken years of gentle persuasion to gain acceptance but here I am, finally!

I am Kev and I am a fan of Manchester United. Well fan doesn’t really cover it, as I say in my facebook profile United is a religion, so you could say that I’m more of a devotee of Sir Alex. Even though I’m from Llandudno I’ve been going since I was 10 so it is in my blood. The amount of games I’ve been to is amazing, I’ve seen them all; Brian McClair, Mark Hughes, Clayton Blackmore, Ole Gunnar, Deiniol Graham. Some might say that people like me are just glory hunters but I’m not. Why should I support a local team? I already support one and as they say, you can change anything apart from your football team. You could even say that people like me are more of a fan than people who live closer to the Thestre of Dreams as we have to make more of an effort to go.

So here we are, another season, how are we going to do? Well anything less than League and European Cup and I’ll be disappointed, the FA Cup doesn’t matter, as for the League Cup it was nice when we were kids but its pointless now. I don’t care if we have lost Ronaldo because we’ve signed a class goal scorer in Michael Owen. You should hear my bitter Scouser mates; they’re all secretly gutted he’s finally joined a proper club. As for those Scousers, they’ll probably bottle it again if they get close. It’ll be just like they say on Sky Sports and in the Sun. Then we’ll break their record, I can’t wait. Who do I see as challengers? The usual mob could be or maybe even the bitter Sky Blues of Citeh.

Every Season is another chance to remind the Scousers who’s boss. I hate Scousers. They’re always living in the past and none of their fans are from Liverpool. (Have you ever seen an interview on Sky Sports News, they’re all Irish!) Every time I see them in Club 147 it’s always great to wind them up, sometimes I turn up just to cheer on the team Liverpool are playing. The bitter Scousers can’t take it but I love winding them up, it’s almost as much fun as watching United.

Of course pre-season wouldn’t be pre-season without a new kit. As usual I was first in Llandudno to get one. It’s great to be the first person in the shirt, walking down the street with everyone looking, you feel ten feet tall. You feel somebody for a couple of hours, only United can make you feel like that!

Anyway, good luck for the Season!

Kev

(Due to contract negotiations we are unsure as to the regularity of this column)