A scientific analysis of England v Italy

17 06 2014

I’ve decided to give the moaning a rest today so that I can devote myself to humanity. This is my rather cumbersome way of saying that I will be using the venture science of football statistical analysis (VSoFSA) to prove how Italy beat England.

After lengthy use of the VSoFSA I can categorically prove why Italy beat England. In fact my VSoFSA skills are so finely tuned I can cut through the needless waffle to show you the exact point at which Italy were able to win.

Here is that moment;

Balotelli, 2

Here it is from another scientific angle, thus proving the scientific rigour of my work

Balotelli, 3

This work is not just based on the naked eye of your uncritical layman, your neanderthal football watchers, it has a firm basis in VSoFSA. Here is the proof via some scienfific diagrams.

Here’s the scene a second before the “Goal Creating Cross From A Position Of Maximum Goalscoring Chance Creation Efficacy Point” (or “GCCFAPOMGCCEP” to those in the know) arrived.

pitch 5

Here’s the scene just after the “GCCFAPOMGCCEP” arrived.


Here’s an added heat map for further scientific rigour.

pitch 4

It ain’t easy being a venture scientist but it is very rewarding.



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