So, how was your Euro?

1 07 2008
In the course of the last post I may have insinuated that I was interested in the European Championships. During the “build-up” to the latest instalment of the bi-annual football binge however I began to think that I would not care for it; I appeared to have developed “Football Fatigue.”

Cliches have a kernel of truth; Familiarity does breed contempt, hence “Football Fatigue” (due primarily to the Champions League) manifested itself. Doctors tell me it’s a nervous condition, I started to feel that I was seeing players everywhere. Deco nonchalantly passing to Messi and Kaka gliding past a hapless defender haunted my dreams. My daytime reverie replayed Critiano Ronaldo nutmegs and Steven Gerrard Blasters.

The adverts for the tournament were very annoying. The BBC press-ganged a load of “ordinary” people/morons into explaining why they were supporting a particular team “…well you gotta ain’t yerrr!”. For some reason ITV opted to show some bloke in a sexual relationship with a 70s style football.

When anyone on that BBC advert enthused about players or teams the same old names cropped up and the shakes started; Torres, Ballack, Cristiano, oh why, oh why, wouldn‘t they spare me? What about Nihat, Zurawski, or Ivanischitz? Nothing

Thanks to this condition this tournament didn’t feel special. It just felt like the season was going on and on and on. The players were familiar, the teams were familiar, even the kits’ all felt familar. Squad numbering used to be just for special ocassions but not any more.

The opening day of the tournament arrived but I was more concerned with Wales playing the rugby-playing wing of Apartheid. Wales lost heavily. Switzerland V Czech Republic was irrelevant, although I did watch it out of habit. The opening ceremony was interesting, cubes and leotards, but brief.

Whilst watching the first half I fell asleep, I woke just in time to see Switzerland’s Frei leaving the pitch. During the second half I fell asleep again and again I woke up just in time to see some notable action. The Czechs scored. During this tournament losing consciousness became a regular occurrence. I missed 5 goals due to sleep.

If I was pushed to describe the tournament I would say it was interesting, despite struggling to stay awake a lot of the time. I actually found it to be one of the more enjoyable recent ones. My lack of enthusiasm was gradually replaced by anticipation. I only found one match, France V Romania, boring beyond belief. There was lots of good football and lots of nice goals. There wasn’t even too much diving.

Here is the Jet Set review of the tournament.

What we Liked

Turkey – The team that never gave up. The Jet Set’s favourite moment of the whole tournament was Nihat’s last minute winner against the Czech Republic. Pundits kept repeating the fact that Turkey had only been ahead for 5 milliseconds in the whole tournament but who cares, what a 5 milliseconds it was!! They scored with the last kick of the Quarter Final to take the match to penalties and then almost reached the final in the same manner but Germany scored another, even later goal to deny them.

Van der Vaart’s Pass to Van Nistelrooy – Van der Vaart; right wing, Horseface; in the middle. Van der Vaart hit the ball exquisitely, with the outside of his foot, just into the path of the Diving Dutchman. The trajectory was so perfect that it just swerved around the reach of the Italian defender’s legs. Unfortunately Horseface failed to score and the tournament was denied it’s best goal.

Martin O’Neill – Gently took the piss out of Shearer and Hansen with his reasonable points.

No England – No pressure to watch football and care who wins, no flags, no face paint, no England shirts seen for a month.

What we didn’t like as much

TVBBC: Alan Shearer, smug and boring; a televisual feast. Alan Hansen’s stack of adjectives grated. Just watch Match of The Day once and that’s the script.
ITV: Gary Neville a pundit!!!! Clive Tyldesley “ Remember only one group has produced two quarter Finalist, yep that’s right England’s”, Andy Townsend. Thank God they got on to the same wavelength as the viewers; They didn’t show the final.

Cristiano Ronaldo – The preening show pony didn’t cement his reputation as the greatest player ever to pull on a Jock Strap. Stick to the Nike adverts baby.

Croatia Diving – In a tournament that didn’t feature as much diving as normal I found some of the Croat players irritating. I felt great satisfaction when Olic, who had conned the ref with a non-existent foul near to the area in Extra Time, missed a penalty in the shootout against Turkey. His face went from kind of condescending expression that screams “Well what do you expect? You tried to tackle me. Who the fuck are you, eh?” to utter dejection in 20 minutes, Ha

Missing the Switzerland V Turkey match – There’s nothing like watching a match in extreme weather conditions , unfortunately I was on a train.




Leave a Reply

Please log in using one of these methods to post your comment: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

%d bloggers like this: